Enlightened

Today, my soul was changed in ways I would not have imagined could occur on today, what I thought was just an ordinary Sunday. Perhaps it was the time I spent in silence on the previous day merely connecting with myself, my soul, a space that is sacred. In reading a book heavily focused on loving yourself and being in connection with your soul several truths were revealed to me in ways that have never before occurred but that I needed to have an internal resting. You see last night even though I was exhausted, when I went to lay down sleep would not come. My mind kept racing about a particular relationship that has been troubling me lately. The dynamics are off, the communication muddy, the interactions-distant. Trying to internally process all that had occurred I found myself blaming one thing and then another for all the variations and what I felt were broken promises. But I knew I needed to turn the page and move forward. I kept trying to cancel out the thoughts as they helped nothing in the long term and finally sleep won.

I woke frustrated but rested and began reading again and there within those pages I found my peace. I was reminded that the water element in life that I worship like religion and have always been drawn to is in many ways like love, at least my love. Dynamic, ever changing, flowing, not containable, forgiving, gracious, covers all wrong…healing for the soul. Me trying to hold onto the same traditions, practices, exchanges, and value in a relationship I realized is ultimately unreasonable especially when in relation with another human as we are constantly growing and hopefully evolving into better, more genuine versions of ourselves. Who am I to enslave another to my version of love? Love is never controlling or forced but easygoing and natural. All things truly done in love emit from the heart and are optional; there is no space for expectations in love.

Thankful for this freeing and peace giving realization of truth. Love…

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